Oooooooooooooh yeeeeaaaaaaahhhhh.
Thanks to Francesco Francavilla (blog) for the borrowed sketch.
Moving right along, time for a header
Steady as she goes
So the fiance and I had a spiff last night. I thin k it all has something to do with the nature of my disorder and the fact that I have so much sexual dysfunction. It might have been affected by her un-medicated state, but that does not excuse my behavior. I dwell on things instead of burying them because I do not know how to deal. When something is on my mind like what I've informally referred to as "sexual frustration" I tend to focus on it because talking about my issues helps me get them out. I haven't seen my therapist in quite a while now, and I absolutely refuse to do anything unhealthy like cutting or obsessive dieting and exercise because as much as it would hurt me (or so I'm told it does. I fucking love doing it.) it would hurt Katie more, and I just want her happy. She makes these offers of ways to fix my problems but they seem like a compromiose of who she is as a person to do so. I know there is no love without some compromise now and again but denying who you are as a person is not the way to healthily remain in a relationship. I know I'm meant to be with her, as she knows she is with me. Nothing changes that. Nothing ever could. But these little roadblocks we hit while our minds are not running at peak performance, they do hurt to go over. So I'm not really completely sure even what we fought about. But I know I made her feel like shit somehow. I hate that, and I don't know how to remedy it. I wish I did. Somehow I think poetry or flowers wont help. But we'll talk about it and see what the issue was/is. It's cliche as all hell, but true love weathers all storms.
It is also likely important to note that I or she or we may be grossly over-reacting. If it turns out to be so, disregard...90% of this post. Just go read the smut instead.
TRUE
LOVE
No comments:
Post a Comment